week in review- self confidence

yerba mate tea is finally kicking in, so i think I shall use my left over energy from hw to blog.
The more i blog about the madness of my life, I want to focus in on the things that i am learning on this journey called life. I hope that my words can influence you, or at least entertain you.

self confidence

This kept coming up as common theme in this week. I think I have situational confidence or something. Where I have confidence in some situations but not others. Maybe everyone is like that. It's like I know what I'm good at, I know what I am capable of, I believe in myself a majority of the time but i doubt myself a lot. And I don't completely understand why.Maybe is just one of the annoying human characteristics like procrastination. lol
But anyways, the first time this came up was during my very first evaluation at work.
As a dancer I'm pretty good at taking criticism, but I have to admit I was pretty freaked out about the review. It went well. but one thing they said is that they wanted me gain more confidence in my work. I wish there was a confidence drink i could take every morning. Confidence instead of coffee every morning. I guess confidence comes from trying. You try something and the more you work at it the better you get at it. I think confidence is a mind set, and comes from constant self reflections and just waking up every morning and telling yourself that you are the shit.
The second time the issue of confidence came up was at work again. When i started my new job i had a crazy boss. and i know that everyone calls their boss crazy, but mine was legitimately crazy. She could have been diagnosis with numerous mental disorders. when I worked for her, she made me feel so uncomfortable, she never gave clear instructions, always doubted and questioned my actions, even talked about me to other coworkers. so I was definitely glad when she was fired.
After she was fired I finally go a great boss that i learned so much from.
But even though my old boss is gone, i realized she left a stain on me. And i think part of why i Struggled with my confidence is because of her. But it really helped when my new boss, pulled me assigned and told me that she believed in me, and had a little hallmark moment. But knowing that she believes in me really helped. and I am very thankful for that

Moral of the story: Have self confidence, be aware of the stains that bad people may leave on you. Tell someone you believe in them, because it might be what they need to hear. And if you think ur boss is crazy you are probably right.